A Memoir of Faith, Identity, Healing, and Learning to Love Myself

A Memoir of Faith, Identity, Healing, and Learning to Love Myself

By Dr. Naomi Rae Taylor

“Without a test, there is no testimony.”

We have known about generational curses, and many of us have lived with the legacy of a generational curse. It takes strength to break the conspiracy of silence, bring it out into the open, and break the curse going forward. These stories need to be shared as inspiration from one who not only survived, but broke the curse. Such is the testimony of Dr. Naomi Rae Taylor’s memoir Choosing to Belong: A Memoir of Faith, Identity, Healing, and Learning to Love Myself.

As a biracial woman born to a White teen mother in the poorest section of St. Paul, Taylor shares the history of the generational curse of her mother’s family, one of physical, emotional, and sexual abuse of the women, from her grandmother (who dealt with abuse in the form of denial), to her mother (who suffered from mental health issues and resorted to prostitution) to herself (experiencing sexual abuse as a child and later becoming, like her mother, a single mother at the age of 15).

Growing up in survival mode, Taylor also dealt with self-esteem issues, identity issues, and an absence of belonging. Her mother told her that her father was Mexican, and the one place she felt love and nurturing was with her tias, especially her godmother Tia Violeta. Her mother, due to her own issues, kept her away from them except during her incarceration. She wanted to be part of Mexican and later Black culture, to have that sense of belonging somewhere when it came to her and her younger sister.

Through this childhood, there would be glimpses of hope. Her prayers to God were there in her darkest hours. People like Tia Violeta, her friend Imani, and the educators who encouraged her to pursue college and a teaching career reminded her that her past did not define her.

The road wasn’t easy, and healing from those wounds takes time. Abusers use fear, intimidation, and the victim’s guilt and shame to control them and perpetuate the conspiracy of silence. Indeed, Taylor questioned why the ones who were supposed to protect and support her did nothing to stop the abuse, instead choosing to live in denial that it happened, to the point where it required persons outside the family to take action.

Through it all, Taylor has broken the curse. As a teen mother of two children, she graduated from high school with honors. She now has a doctorate in educational leadership and is an educator and advocate for social justice. The founder of Pleasant Spirit Consulting, she builds bridges. In her words, she is “an accomplished educator, adept at teaching both children and adults, while also excelling as a facilitator, guiding adults in their personal development.” And let us remember the all-important key to her success—her faith journey.

Choosing to Belong is available through Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and AuthorHouse.

Thank you, Naomi, for sharing your strength, resilience, faith, hope, and your victory with us.